Synchronistic Imagery

Posted: June 25th, 2010 | Author: | Filed under: Uncategorized | Comments Off

    Yesterday I had the most serious of all cancer powwows to date, I met with my Oncologist for the first time. A few days ago I had no idea what the jaheebers an Oncologist did, other than being involved with the treatment of cancer. In my research I learned they are, in football terms, the head coach. In war terms they would be the henchman type General, “Send that soldier out to the front lines. Send this one on a recon to find out what the enemy is up to. Send this one to clean the latrines.”
   The Oncologist decides what course of treatment you’ll take to fight the battle of your life. And, they’ll forever more monitor your case, be on the hunt for and make cancer tactical decisions. I wondered what mine was going to be like. Who would the Universe plunk onto my new path.
    Before going to my appointment I did my best to get grounded and prepared. My stomach was a flutter, my brain was racing and I felt jittery. I knew this meant I had too much energy swirling around within my being. This just leads to excess adrenaline pumping through the body, which for me, leads to a Fibro flare up. Time to take control.
    So, I sat my over active brain and butt down and gave myself some Reiki and then meditated. While I did the Reiki I ‘saw’ myself in a beautiful Zen garden. I was surrounded by beings who loved me deeply and were meditating with me. It was calming and soothing.

    After I was done with the Reiki I let my imagination meander, let it flow. I ‘saw’ myself get up from the meditation in the Zen garden and then calmly, with deliberation get dressed for battle. But I did not don full Samurai armor. Instead I put on a lovely Kimono and donned only my sword.
    This imagery was going to be my Cancer Girl fantasy lead in bit for my pre-Oncologist visit blog post yesterday. I even had a Zen garden picture picked out. Something told me to wait to write/post until after the visit. I’ve learned to listen to these “somethings.” So, I changed my desktop background to the photograph that you now see above.

    Keeping the picture of the Zen garden and the morning’s meditation imagery in my mind, I refocussed any nervous energy that would spike into curiosity. I enjoy meeting new people. Sitting back and reading them while getting to know them. I wondered, maybe I needed to see the role of the Oncologist as being more like a War Lord. The Samurai did defer to their War Lords. Was this part of what the meditation meant?
    I had an informative, pragmatic, hilarious and life-n-death serious meeting with Dr. M. I told him of my various imagery scenarios as to what an Oncologist’s role was — a head coach, a henchman General or a War Lord. But, I told him nothing of my Samurai meditation imagery. He made a passing comment about how the Samurai were actually very calm, self disciplined and how War Lords were practical minded. My little internal eyebrow did an “ahha.”
    As much as I was sizing him up, he was sizing me up too. He looked me straight in the eye when he spoke, with respect and a sliver of mischievousness. Most people get unnerved when someone looks them straight in the eye while having a conversation. I know this because that’s what I do, and I’ve seen many a time those with less than a pure heart grow increasingly uncomfortable.
    Dr. M, or should I call him Shōgun Maghun or Sensei Maghun? … Anywho, Dr. M clearly stated what his expert opinion of a treatment course for me was. He did a breast examination, we discussed it a little bit more. Once again, in passing, he asked me, “Do you know how the Samurai often used their enemies?” I answered, “Yes, they used their enemy’s own strength against them, often without ever lifting a sword.” He smiled and nodded and then he handed me a slate of magic.
    He handed me his IPod, I held it in my hands and all of a sudden there were Koi fish swimming in a crystal clear stony Zen pond. Most of the Koi were a beautiful blue with white markings, a few were red with white markings. He said, “go ahead, touch it.” I touched the screen, it sounded as if my foot had stepped into the water. I giggled like a child in wonderment. The he brought up a little picture menu on the side and told me to touch it and drag my finger out onto the pond. A perfect little dragonfly flew out from my finger tip and noisily fluttered across the pond. I squealed with delight. He then told me to touch the water again. The dragonfly calmly landed and floated on the water while the Koi continued to lazily swim about.
    It really did feel like I was holding magic in my hands. It was so calming and beautiful, it was exactly what I needed after such serious cancer news. And, it left me feeling like the whole imagery theme within my mind’s inner sanctum had given me a sign. That the synchronistic imagery I had seen within my mind, and now held in my hands, was telling me Dr. M was the right Shōgun for me to heed.
    It is often the subtle things that answer the big things … just like synchronistic imagery.

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